She used to LOVE having sex. Her libido was singing and making love three times a week didn’t seem crazy.
“What happened!?” she wonders to herself.
The thought of having sex twice a week doesn’t seem so inspired now.
She loves her partner so much and knows deep down he’s stopped asking and initiating (which some part of her deep down really desires – him taking her) because he no longer wants to deal with the rejection.
She knows how much better she felt then and she definitely knows this dark, heavy cloud of unspoken tension is not what she wants for them.
She knows it is time to take responsibility for her part in this relationship and for her happiness – and pleasure too. She wonders “What do I need to do?” “How can I get back to that place again?”
I know she is not alone and I have felt this way too so I’ve put together 10 Easy Ways To Start Desiring Sex Again.
1. Take Total Responsibility For Your Life – No More Blame Game.
2. Get Really Clear On What You Want Your Experience To Be. Write It Down.
3. Cultivate Hope. If part of you doesn’t believe it, you block it. So after you write it down, visualize and feel it.
4. Sit In Gratitude. Remember your favorite times together and the things he’s done for you. This will start to dissolve resentment.
5. Explore What It Is That’s Holding You Back.
6. Overcome What’s Holding You Back. This may require assistance and support.
7. Get Your Sexy On – For You. Dress for sucsex. Set aside time for self pleasuring.
8. Set and Stick To A Date Time.
9. Be Intimate – With No Expectations.
10. Be a Yes and Initiate.
I believe you can do it, but you need to know that it takes commitment and diligence. I have learned a lot of things the slow, hard and expensive (mentally, emotionally, physically and financially) way but you don’t have to.
In the comments below share one step you commit to doing this week. If you loved this article you’ll want to make sure you don’t miss the next ones , so enter your name and email below so you don’t miss a thing. Share the love <3
Do you want someone to support you along the way? To help you to see things you don’t see, give you guidance and a listening ear? Do you wish you had all the tools you need to take your relationship and life where you desire it in the most playful and joyful way?
If you answered yes to any of those questions then I have a recommendation for you. I have just started taking applications for July’s Get Your Sexy On Breakthrough Sessions. These are designed for women who are ready to really dive into being the most fully expressed, joyful version of themselves so they can create the deep, intimate and passionate relationship they desire. To apply for one of these complimentary sessions click here.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Allison, as always you challenge us so we can live at our happiest! I am grateful that I have finally acknowledged that I do have strong physical desires and am working to clarify what they mean. Clarity, come to me! lol k
My problem is not the lack of desire but the distance between us (literally!). I just moved to the East coast and my boyfriend has a Indonesian surf guide gig for the summer. This is one realm we always had a great grasp on but at the moment is hard to adjust! Even if I didn’t feel drawn to the title for these reasons, I really enjoyed #4; to be grateful for the love we share no matter the distance/time apart and to remind myself of the nice things he’s done for me and that we’ve done together! Thinking with that attitude serves me way more than feeling like there’s something missing ya know? Thanks